Monday, January 31, 2011

Minecraft:: Colliding Worlds - Part 1

July 4th

My name is Geoff. I am transcribing these events because I feel it entirely necessary for future generations to understand what happened here in the Land of Draid.

I was born far away, in the Land of Dynl, named after the Lord Dwarf Dynl. Under his command, we lived securely in the Fortress of Beeranger. A bustling society of over two hundred dwarfs, we were well-equipped and well protected by the landscape. But I wanted something else. I never felt at home with my fellow dwarfs. Society was to hectic, too demanding. I desperately wanted out. One day, my chance came.

My father was very ill. As he lay on his deathbed, he insisted I have his chest. The sacred chest that he had since as long as I could remember. He told me only to open it when the time was right. I didn't understand at the time. Now I do.

After he died, I knew it was time to leave. With nothing but some basic supplies and the chest, I set off in the direction of Draid, alone.

Here I am, years later and living comfortably. After arriving in this new land, I found an area rich in soil, water and resources, and began to build.

When my father died, he left me a small package in addition to the chest. It was a small sapling. My father called it "The Tree of Life". He told me to find fertile ground outside the Land of Dynl, otherwise it would not grow. After building my house in Draid, I dutifully followed my father's wishes. Amazingly, when I awoke only a mere day later, I saw the tallest tree I had ever seen.

Life was good. My solitary acreage was peaceful and pleasant.

Until tonight.

It was dark. I awoke to horrible sounds. Inhuman sounds. I had never heard these sounds before. Draid was normally a peaceful territory, with no real threat for a long ways. But this...these noises were hostile. Dangerous. I looked outside.

The tree of life was burning. Burning to the ground. The magnificantly bright flames shone through the blackness, as similar fires sprung up all around. The land was in chaos. It was dying. I spotted shapes in the distance. I feared for what they might be.

I knew this was what my father meant when he said "the right time". It was time to finally open the chest. I ran to the hollow spot in the wall, breaking it open for the first time in ages. It was time.

My father's sacred chest awaited me.

I opened it. Inside was a mighty diamond sword, engraved with beautiful markings. I had only heard rumor of legendary diamond swords, I had never seen them in real life. Only true blacksmiths had the skill to make such masterful weaponry. Next to it lay an old and tattered note. I picked it up.

Geoff, if you are reading this, it means I have most likely died. I pray you have left the Land of Dynl by now, the other dwarfs will be of no use here. They are not prepared. They have no idea what they will be up against, and the terrain is to frigid to survive long in such hectic conditions.

This sword belonged to be, and was smithed by a very old friend of mine. Take good care of it. You'll need it.

When the demons rise from the Nether, you have to find a portal. This is vital. You'll know a portal when you see one. These are the only gates to the Nether, and you'll only chance at stopping this fabled onslaught of death. I have no faith in other dwarfs in other regions. I am relying on you, and you alone. Good luck.

I grabbed the sword, made some last minute preparations, and set out, leaving my beautiful home behind. I couldn't stay here any longer.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Minecraft: Colliding Worlds - Part 2

July 15th

At the dawn of a new day, I set off into the sunrise.

As I looked out along the landscape, I did not come across any demons that I had heard during the night. Perhaps they did not appear among the light.

After a little while, I found a small dugout in a large hill. It felt...homely. I decided to modify it slightly and inhabit it for the time being, as night was approaching. After a few changes, my makeshift home was complete, and darkness descended upon me.

Boredom set in. To take my mind of the howls of the dead, I began to dig. I dug and dug and dug. It was all I could think of doing.

While digging into the Earth, I came across a freshwater stream leading into a dark, unfriendly cave. Dwarf instincts took over, and I perused it.
Not far into this cave, I heard a rustling. Sword at the ready, I slowly crept into the darkness. Sudenly, a white arrow flew to my direction! It smashed into my armor, doing only minimal damage. Before I could consciously react, my body had already responded, swinging the sword into the darkness. I felt it contact with something hard, and the thing stopped moving. I lit the area around me, and saw a skeleton laying crumpled on the floor. The sight sent chills through my body. I continued on, warily.

After scavenging the cave for any useful resources, I backtracked and planned to follow another route. However, before I began, I saw something lumbering out of the darkness. It was terrifying, and I had never seen it before in my life. I lunged at it with my sword, and it flew back into the wall upon contact with my sword. Then it made the most peculiar sizzling sound. I decided to rush backwards. Moments later, I realized this was a very good move.

The creature had quite literally exploded, leaving a charred hole in its wake. Peering past it into the darkness, I decided never to step foot in that direction. Immediately, I walled it up, and retreated back to my man-made tunnel.
I decided to briefly return to the surface, and smelt the iron I had recovered. Noticing it was daylight, I no longer cared. I returned to my tunnel, and dug deeper.

After a short while, I broke through the roof of yet another natural cave. The sight was nerve-racking.
A terrible creature I could only describe as a zombie greeted me, moaning horrifically. I decided it was in my best interest to put it out of its misery. Boldly, I jumped into the cave and slayed it.

After a quick search for additional threats turned up nothing, I lit the cave and harvested any resources. I had almost left, when I noticeda small opening in the wall that led to an unexplored area. I entered it.

A small hallway carved itself deep into the Earth, almost looking like a pair of stairs. This was too...unique to not explore. The darkness beckoned me forward. I had to follow.

After the reaching the bottom, I found a small cave. I decided that since the surface was so far away, I would build another makeshift base in this "room" and rest before continuing on.
Despite the fact that the passage had ended here, I felt confident that something was here. I simply needed to find it. I was confident I would. I had to. I could not bear knowing so little about the situation at hand. I needed answers, and something about this place insisted that it had them.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Apple's percentage of the US PC market falls to 7.4%

What's that I hear? It sounds like...a recession! Right outside the door! Looks like people can't afford to pay the Apple Tax when they have the more important Income Tax shitting all over their wallets. Maybe if you lowered your stupid fucking prices Apple, people would start buying your shit products again like the morons they are. But when America is in the middle of a recession, you can only choose one:

a) High Prices

b) Shitty Products

"Baby Shaker" App removed from iPhone App Store - Disregard for Freedom Abundant

Apple removed an app from the app store, because it had supposedly received a lot of complaints. This is just another show of Apple's malicious restricting of their own App Store. Apps have to be personally reviewed by Apple Employees, which is bullshit, and now App Stores are been pulled AFTER being given the green light?

If you approved the fucking app, you approved the fucking app! Is this a hard concept to understand? "We Just approved a law that bans rape. Oh no, all the rapists of the world are saying we should remove that law. Okay them, hooray for peer pressure!"

Not to mention the fact that the app was fucking awesome and removing it is a sin. It let you shake a crying baby. I can't possibly think of a better use for the iPhone than that.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Snow Leopard Feature Allows Screen Capture (!)

HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS. APPLE's new OS, Snow Leopard, is reported to have this awesome new feature where you can record on screen tasks. This has MADE Snow Leopard that more fucking awesome, with ANOTHER cool gadget to play with! This is obviously a lot better than the SHITTY GIMMICK programs that are free and all over the Windows Operating System. I'm so pumped for this new feature!

(Hint: Read the words in CapsLock to hear what I really think!)

Friday, April 24, 2009

Windows 7 - Basic Can't Change Background?!

Yeah yeah, this is an anti-Apple blog, but when Microsoft does something as stupid as this, it deserves to be mentioned.

The new Windows 7 Basic version can't change their background.


Yeah, what? That is fucking ridiculous. There are some ways around it, but it's possible the exploits will either

A) Be Fixed in the final build
B) Not be permanent

Microsoft, u r dum. Change it back.
(Because they will totally hear me)

PS: I got reports that its old but its news to me

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Mac VS PC: Pricing

Everyone knows Macs are priced high, but some poeple would also lead you to believe that you are paying the extra for better "parts" or software.

Today's post will completely end this notion for Macs (not macbooks) once and for all.

I'm going to compare the price of a custom built PC to the price of a prebuilt Mac, to see the specs and price, and if the difference really is accounted for or not.

First complaint I can already hear pouring in: BUT CAWMBAT, IM 2 DUM 2 BUILT CIOMPUTER!!!11

Protip: get someone to build it for you. I'm sure there is SOMEONE who is willing to put it together for you. If there isn't put it together yourself, you pansy. It's pretty damn easy. If you are seriously lost, buy a guide by PC gamer or something, they have PC Builder Bible Issues.

Second complaint rushing in like a flood: BUT CAWMBAT, MAC OS X IS TTLY FUKN SUPERIOR 2 UR SHIT M$ LOL!!!!

As much as I disagree with you on that, there is a simple way around that. There are plenty of simple procedures that allow you to run Mac Leopard on any PC, and even dual boot between the two. So, both computers, the mac and the custom built, will run Leopard. All parts from the Custom Built PC will be bought from Newegg.

Without further ado, let the macfags get TOLD.

Mac: 2.66 GHZ Quad Core Intel
PC: 3.2 GHZ Quad Core Intel
WINNER: It's fairly obvious; the Custom Built.

Mac: 8GB DDR2 (4x2GB)
PC: 12GB DDR3 (6x2GB)
WINNER: Custom Built, especially since its DDr3 RAM.

Hard Drives
Mac: 3TB Hard Drive Space (3x1TB Drives)
PC: 4TB Hard Drive Space (4 x 1TB Drives)
WINNER: Custom Built.

Video Card
Mac: 2x nVidia GTX 120 (SLI)
PC: 2x nVidia GTX 285 (SLI)
WINNER: The Mac just got murdered. Custom Built wins.

Optical Drive
Mac: 18x SuperDrive DVD Burner/Reader
PC: Blu Ray and DVD Burner/Reader
WINNER: Custom Built.

Mac: Apple 24" Cinema Display
PC: 26" Monitor
Winner: Custom Built. Screen Size is bigger, response time is better, and max res will be the same.


Mac: -Unknown-
PC: eVGA ATX Classified Motherboard
WINNER: Definately the Custom Built. I don't know the Mac motherboard, but this mobo is almost 500 dollars, barely anything can beat it.

Power Supply
Mac -Unknown-
PC: 1200watt Power Supply
WINNER: Custom Built.

Mac: $4,498.00 USD
PC: $3,885.00 USD

Well, what do you know? the mac didn't win any of the categories. I sure didn't see this coming. At all. Totally.